I may have mentioned, in passing, the old woman in an adjacent apartment building who, for the past four years or more, yells into the airshaft for Frank. I may also have mentioned that I do not believe in Frank. There is no Frank. It’s not like I ever heard him answer!
I did not believe Frank existed… Until today. You see, “Frank” has become “Ron.”
E was kind enough to transcribe the following screamed conversation and email it to me while I was at work this morning:
the old woman who used to yell “frank” out the window just yelled for “ron.” and this time, there was an answer.
woman: ron! are you there? … ron? i need to talk to you.
ron: what do you want?
woman: i need to talk to you.
ron: i’m busy. what do you need.
woman: i can’t walk.
woman: i need two things out of that apartment.
ron: what apartment?
woman: the one you’re going to empty out.
ron: what do you need?
woman: i need the toilet seat and the two knobs from the bathroom sink.
woman: thank you.
E’s theory: i think that the old woman is the landlord and ron is her new super. i wonder what happened to frank.
My theory: The old woman just wants a new toilet seat.