Pictures of Me*

I’ve been asked to send in an author photo by the end of the month to be used for the upcoming fall launch. I can specify that it can be for launch only, and not for other marketing purposes or to use on the book, which I may have to do, because I have less than two weeks to find a viable photo of me.

At the moment I don’t have any usable options.

Sure, there’s the one where I’m hanging upside down and my hair’s all up in my face and my nose looks like a big white blob because I’m holding the camera so close to my head…

And, sure, there’s the one where I’m trying to smile and one eye is suddenly revealed to be bigger than the other…

And, sure, I have a whole series of self-portraits taken in my studio at the writers colony when I was playing around instead of writing, such as the photo of my head in the fireplace, my head on the table, my head in striped shadows on the dirty floor, my head on the piano, et cetera…

And, oh right, there’s the one where I’m stiffly sitting in a chair and my hair is sticking out to one side and my eyes look dead…

A great favorite is the one of me when I just had my wisdom teeth out and look like a pained, drugged-up chipmunk. Do you think people will want to buy the book if they feel sorry for me?

I’ll come up with something. Unfortunately, of all the talented photographers I know, none of them live in New York City anymore. How is that possible!

* Thoughts of the Elliott Smith song run through my mind. (Oh, Elliott Smith, you are missed.)


6 responses to “Pictures of Me*”

  1. I would tell you not to freak out but that would make me look like a big hypocrite. So instead I will tell you to enjoy this angst! Because on the whole, it’s good angst to have.
    (AUTHOR PHOTO!!!!)


  2. Can E. translate his film skills and take a picture of you? I like to utilize my husband’s skills whenever possible 🙂 – best to get it over with, though, yes, and have the picture taken? I’m sure it will turn out beautifully!


  3. Duuude. If I saw a book where the author photo was upside-down, I would totally buy it based solely on that photo.

    But usually it either has to have been mentioned by someone in a conversation earlier, or have a pretty cover and catchy title, in that order, for me to even consider picking it up and looking at the author photo.

    And yes, yes I do realize that’s not fair to good authors that end up with bad book covers. Buuut it’s just how my strange little brain works >_>;;


  4. do what i plan to do when & if my magnum opus ever sees the light of publishing: run somebody else’s photograph. someone famous, preferably, though don’t go for someone like paris hilton. they may think you stoopid.


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